Let's start at the beginning...

I'm never successful when I attempt to start a blog. I run out of things to say, or there's not anything going on that is exciting enough to report. Well, this blog is going to be for my benefit as much as for yours. I have a horrible memory, and as much as I believe I won't ever forget the past 7 months, I can't be too sure. I want to remember the details, as well as life altering events. And more than anything, I want to look back on every day and thank God for getting me through, and for letting me have another. As I was on my way home this afternoon from Wellbound, after hearing bad news, I was asking the Lord to give me some reason. I wanted to know why. Why the constant complications? Why the health issues so young? Why come so close to death? Why live?...and it hit me. It could be next week, next year, or when I'm 80, but there is a reason I carry this "burden". And the kicker, I may never know it. But I'm ok with that. If the trials of my life bring glory to God, bring em on. I don't need to know the answers, just that I'm making Him happy. 

ANYWAY, I plan on recounting as much of the past 7 months as I can remember. And on from there. Because I believe that God can heal me. And when He does, I want to be able to tell the story of what He's done. 
I'm pretty sure that any of you reading this has probably been through it with me from the beginning. I'm sorry if it's redundant. But in case there are gaps in your knowledge this might answer any questions you had (but may be afraid to ask).

September 23, 2011: I gave birth to Eloise Justine Hill. Pregnancy was normal, gestational diabetes was annoying, but I had a great pregnancy otherwise. Not a lick of morning sickness, and great labor/delivery in my opinion. (The Dr's believe that this all came about because of a trigger, and my trigger was most likely pregnancy. But it has shown in the past to attack right away, not 5 months later, like it did with me)

February 2012: I was a floral designer and we had just come through the Valentine's season when I got a headache for 8 days that wouldn't go away. I thought nothing of it. When I told my boss, she said it's typical because of designing for such long hours can give you a neck ache resulting in headache. Ok, made sense to me. We went to visit Joey's family for the weekend in KY Feb 24-26 (Fri-Sun). That first night, I was soooooo tired. We had hung out and played cards and then went to Walmart on the way back to our hotel and I was shuffling through the store just trying to make it. Just kept telling Joey how tired I was. The next day I woke up feeling better and we went to the in-laws for donuts and coffee (I ate 3 glazed donuts!!) and then relaxed till it was time to go to grandma's house for lunch and games. By the time that rolled around I was exhausted and had lost my appetite. I remember picking at my food and practically falling asleep on the couch with Eloise. We decided to go back to the hotel for a nap before games that night at Joey's parent's. When I woke up I was sluggish and had no appetite, and was just downright ick. But we went to game night, that I suffered through because I was so tired and had no energy. The next morning I could barely get out of bed. I had no interest in eating, showering, or even being with Eloise. We ran over to the in-laws to say goodbye and hit the road. I slept the whole 4 hours home. And then when we got home. And for the next 3 days.  

March 1, 2012: I went to see the Doctor. They sent me to the ER, saying that I was really pale, and probably needed fluids. And they wanted some labs done. Thought it was probably mono. Great. 
They drew the labs and I waited for results. Doctors were in an out, it was a blur. One came back in with diagnosis. She said, severe anemia, mono, and kidney failure. Get this, all I thought was Mono! I don't want Eloise to get it! I had been kissing all over her! The anemia and kidney failure bits went in one ear and out the other. Turns out the mono was the one misdiagnosis. At one point some doctor poked his head in and said, just a heads up, they are going to be putting in a catheter. Didn't want you to be surprised. HAHAHAHAHA. The only catheter I had ever known of was bladder. That's what I was expecting. I was whisked off to a room (being admitted) where 3 nurses were talking about getting the catheter in and then starting dialysis that night at 9pm and then doing plasmapheresis. I thought they were talking about another patient until they looked at me and said, ya ready? Who? Me??? Wait, what are you talking about? Honey, your kidney's are failing, you need dialysis. What the heck is dialysis?!!?!
That afternoon I met Dr Al-Makki (my nephrologist) and had an internal jugular catheter placed in my neck. Afterwords I met Dr Jones (my hemotologist) and was told I had the rare blood disorder called TTP (thrombotic throbocytopenic purpura). That caused my kidneys to shut down. That night at 9pm I met the wonderful Becca (dialysis nurse) and had my first plasmapheresis. I had no idea what I was in for and that I can't fix any of this. Crazy times ahead.

This is all for today. Need to spend time with family. I'm learning to spend every day like it could be my last, and thank God for another day to watch my baby grow. I don't want to take anything for granted. 

Praise God.